I was recently assessing a team where the ablest individual had a lot going for him. He parsed data well, he was articulate, he interacted with the group appropriately, and was overall extremely likeable. Unfortunately, he also chose to wear wrinkled pants and an un-ironed shirt to a formal assessment…
when he walked into the room those who did not know his technical prowess immediately judged him on face value. As part of the assessment team I believed strongly that the tough message had to be said about his less polished edge. He greatly appreciated the feedback.
Many of you might be struggling with a similar issue considering that it is mid-year review time. How will you handle it? I conducted an informal survey with my fellow coaches and professional talent assessors and have put together some tips for you to deliver this possibly uncomfortable message. They all agreed it was worth the effort. Here is a summary of some of the takeaways:
Why should I care? Why should they care?
First of all, you must get your head around “why” this type of feedback is important and what the benefit is for providing the feedback. All of my assessment colleagues agreed that first impressions do count. The first impression isn’t everything, but it can hold others back from wanting to find out more about someone. People (rightly or wrongly) judge on how someone dresses. The good news is that how to dress appropriately is coachable. The direct approach is recommended especially when presented within the context of helping someone be more effective or influential. Be direct and include the benefits of the person making some changes.
Make certain to ask questions
One very good suggestion was to make sure one asks questions to determine the level of awareness first before making too many suggestions in such a personal subject. The issue should be explored in the context of development and preparing for the future. As you "explore" what the person believes it would take to be seen as capable at the next level, ask questions about what the person believes are the elements that affect presence. This approach can help lead him to his own realization for the need to change. Someone this articulate may list items that are important such as speech/diction, voice clarity, eye contact, handshake, and language capabilities that are "active" parts of professional presence. However, this person may not be as aware of more "passive" parts of presence that have to do with the non-verbal/non-interactive elements, e.g., attire, jewelry, and scent.
Ask him to rate himself on each of these dimensions, both "active" and "passive." This self-assessment should help gauge his level of awareness.
If needed, be blunt
Sometimes it may take a very blunt approach for full understanding of the issue. Here are several different scripts that my colleagues and I recommend:
“One of your development areas has to do with managerial (or supervisorial, or executive) ‘presence’ and how others perceive and are likely to react to you. You may find you have to adapt your style of dress, too. I've notice that this company is very buttoned down/very polished/very tailored...especially at the next level…. have you noticed this? How do you plan to address this?”
Alternatively, here is an even more direct approach:
"I think you'll find that your style of dress is seen as more rumpled than the other VPs, and it might even impact how they view you. While it shouldn't matter, it does. Is this something that you find important enough to think about?"
Of course, if you have a lot of trust built up, more than one of the assessors surveyed recommended asking the person for permission to be very, very blunt:
“Are you open to some hard advice?” (The answer of course is yes).
“You need to dress better”.
If you are working with someone as a peer, a friend, a coach, or as a manager and you notice a blind-spot such as dress that is impacting their career, do not be afraid of delivering the tough message. Tie the message to impact and keep it future focused, and you might just be the one person that helps that diamond in the rough move to the next level.
Many of you might be struggling with a similar issue considering that it is mid-year review time. How will you handle it? I conducted an informal survey with my fellow coaches and professional talent assessors and have put together some tips for you to deliver this possibly uncomfortable message. They all agreed it was worth the effort. Here is a summary of some of the takeaways:
Why should I care? Why should they care?
First of all, you must get your head around “why” this type of feedback is important and what the benefit is for providing the feedback. All of my assessment colleagues agreed that first impressions do count. The first impression isn’t everything, but it can hold others back from wanting to find out more about someone. People (rightly or wrongly) judge on how someone dresses. The good news is that how to dress appropriately is coachable. The direct approach is recommended especially when presented within the context of helping someone be more effective or influential. Be direct and include the benefits of the person making some changes.
Make certain to ask questions
One very good suggestion was to make sure one asks questions to determine the level of awareness first before making too many suggestions in such a personal subject. The issue should be explored in the context of development and preparing for the future. As you "explore" what the person believes it would take to be seen as capable at the next level, ask questions about what the person believes are the elements that affect presence. This approach can help lead him to his own realization for the need to change. Someone this articulate may list items that are important such as speech/diction, voice clarity, eye contact, handshake, and language capabilities that are "active" parts of professional presence. However, this person may not be as aware of more "passive" parts of presence that have to do with the non-verbal/non-interactive elements, e.g., attire, jewelry, and scent.
Ask him to rate himself on each of these dimensions, both "active" and "passive." This self-assessment should help gauge his level of awareness.
If needed, be blunt
Sometimes it may take a very blunt approach for full understanding of the issue. Here are several different scripts that my colleagues and I recommend:
“One of your development areas has to do with managerial (or supervisorial, or executive) ‘presence’ and how others perceive and are likely to react to you. You may find you have to adapt your style of dress, too. I've notice that this company is very buttoned down/very polished/very tailored...especially at the next level…. have you noticed this? How do you plan to address this?”
Alternatively, here is an even more direct approach:
"I think you'll find that your style of dress is seen as more rumpled than the other VPs, and it might even impact how they view you. While it shouldn't matter, it does. Is this something that you find important enough to think about?"
Of course, if you have a lot of trust built up, more than one of the assessors surveyed recommended asking the person for permission to be very, very blunt:
“Are you open to some hard advice?” (The answer of course is yes).
“You need to dress better”.
If you are working with someone as a peer, a friend, a coach, or as a manager and you notice a blind-spot such as dress that is impacting their career, do not be afraid of delivering the tough message. Tie the message to impact and keep it future focused, and you might just be the one person that helps that diamond in the rough move to the next level.
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